By Lisa Harris
Well my resolution to jog has not been consistently kept. Who would have thought that would have been the outcome? I have to say I almost believed that I had it in me to become a marathon jogger until I tried to increase my jog to walk increments. Instead of jogging one minute and thirty seconds to two minutes of walking, I was supposed to bump it up to 2 minutes of jogging and less walk time. I found this to be impossible! I have come to realize that 48 may be too late to take up these skills, and I may just need to walk a bit with very brief spurts of jogging when the mood hits. I have tried to follow the teachings of The Little Engine That Could but have come to realize that he was a sadistic freak and over achiever! Jogging is hard on the knees and causes excessive movement of body parts. I am glad I at least have a partner to walk/jog with. It must be true that misery loves company.
I learned recently that I am no Martha Stewart! I tried without success to make a delicious caramel pie. I carefully boiled my evaporated milk for two hours. My son said one hour and a half, but I wanted it to thicken up nicely. After the cans cooled I went to open them. Well, dang it all if there was nothing but hot milk in there! Apparently the recipe called for sweetened condensed milk. I guess that was two hours of my life I will never get back. Live and learn!
I learned that if you make a movie of your Facebook life on the social media network it scrambles random photos of you and your family that you have posted over your Facebook journey. I also learned that it randomly pops up your embarrassing statuses related to your mental illness at the time. Random photos of your X will also pop up as part of your Facebook journey. I think I could’ve put together a better montage of photos and statuses. I also would have picked better background music. Perhaps Born to Be Wild or something of that nature would have been more appropriate.
I have been asked to host the Newlywed Game at a church banquet for Valentine’s Day. I’m not sure I have the correct credentials to host a love festival but they say that those who cannot do teach so take that for what it is worth! I will just stick to interrogating the panel with love questions. My only regret is I am not allowed to say inappropriate things like WHOOPI! I was so wanting to straddle the boundary line of appropriate and non- inappropriate like a tight rope walker to make it more interesting, but I promised to be good. I have learned many lessons from past behavior and mistakes need to be learned from and not repeated. So, here’s to lessons learned.